A big part of all this will be some "finding of myself". I feel that I have a lot of room for expansion, in a sense. I have to have more interests than I think I do. Surely I can do more personal little projects than I have in the past. And maybe I can figure out what haircut I want and what my clothing style actually is. (current hairstyle: "growing it out", and current clothing style: "lazy", usually t-shirts)
I'll start with editing my NaNo novel, which I purposefully put off until January in order to get some distance and be able to spot flaws easier. When I get some good excerpts, I might post a few on here for your fiction reading enjoyment.
On a completely different note, because heck, my mind just jumps around sometimes...
I've been having lots of dreams and nightmares lately. I know it's because I'm giving myself more time to sleep while I'm on break from school, and I like it in a way, because it's always interesting to see what my mind throws at me. But it also sucks when I have the nightmares, which come pretty often. Sometimes, I can see how they reflect my real-life anxieties, but often, they're just upsetting.
This morning, I dreamed that I was driving a truck and two of the tires went off the side of a bridge. I was hanging there in that dangling vehicle, looking at the ground below and wondering desperately if I would survive the fall and what type of injuries I would sustain from it. I was certain that I wasn't going to get off of that bridge without falling. I knew that the people I was calling to for help were too far away and probably wouldn't get to me in time.
|Imagine something like this.|
|Or maybe this.|
Why does my brain want to scare me? Why does it bully me into desperation and fear?
When I think hard enough, I begin to wonder if this particular dream was reflecting some real fears of mine after all. Maybe, instead of focusing on the truck and the accident, I should consider the people there who were too far away to help me. I have a guess as to what that means, and it has to do with my independence. Not the reality of failure, but the fear of it.
I shouldn't be so afraid of falling. Everyone does it at some point, after all. And as all the platitudes say, the important part is retaining the ability to get back up from it.
An article I read once on dream interpretation ending by saying that the most reliably accurate way to interpret dreams was for the dreamer to do the interpreting. If you are the one looking into your own dreams for meaning, you're most likely to find your answers there, because you can take into account all of your personal experiences and feelings that may be factors in the meaning.
Try a little dream interpretation of your own today, and if you don't already have a blog post in mind, feel free to take this as your idea. If you leave a comment with a link to your dream post, I'll link up in this post so that other readers can get their fill of dream interpretation and/or new blogs to read!
Of course, there may not be anyone that wants to take me up on this offer. Oh well. That just means I will be unique today, and this will be the only place you can get your fill of my lovely ideas.